If you’ve ever dealt with a narcissist, you know the world they create isn’t like anything you’ve ever experienced. They can be smooth, charming, and disarmingly likable until you do something that does not align with their shitty behaviours. Behind that mask is a person with an insatiable hunger for control, validation, and dominance. And their behavior? It’s not just toxic it’s downright shocking.
Here’s a raw look at 10 things narcissists do that will leave your jaw on the floor.
1. They Rewrite History to Fit Their Narrative
Narcissists don’t just lie. They restructure reality. If something goes wrong or they get called out, they’ll flat-out rewrite the past, making themselves the victim or the hero, depending on the situation. Facts don’t matter to them. What matters is that they control how you and others perceive the situation. Don’t be surprised if they convince everyone that they were the one who “always had your back” when it was actually you doing all the heavy lifting.
2. They Genuinely Believe They’re Entitled to Everything
Ever notice how narcissists don’t seem to understand the word “no”? They truly believe the world revolves around them, and if they want something, whether it’s your time, your energy, or even your personal belongings, they are entitled to it. It doesn’t matter if you’re struggling, busy, or overwhelmed. If they want something from you, you’re expected to drop everything. They’ll guilt-trip, manipulate, or use charm to get what they want. And the worst part? They expect it without apology.
3. They Turn Your Support Into Control
A narcissist doesn’t understand the concept of unconditional love or support. If you’re there for them in times of crisis, they’ll twist that into a form of power. Suddenly, you’re not being a good friend or partner, you’re “indebted” to them. They’ll hold your kindness over your head, reminding you how much they sacrificed for you, even if you never asked for anything in return. Your emotional support becomes a currency they can use against you later.
4. They Love to Humiliate You in Public
Most people try to avoid embarrassing others in public. Not narcissists. They thrive on putting you in your place, especially in front of others. Whether it’s a cruel comment, a snide remark, or outright public humiliation, a narcissist will often make you feel small just to reinforce their sense of superiority. This behavior serves two purposes: it reasserts their dominance and it gaslights everyone around you, making you look like the problem. You’re left questioning if you overreacted, but deep down, you know they took pleasure in putting you down.
5. They Love the “Silent Treatment” to Manipulate You
Forget fighting fair. Narcissists don’t argue; they punish. One of the most insidious things they do is use the silent treatment as a weapon. When you’re in the middle of a conflict or trying to address an issue, they’ll completely withdraw, leaving you in the dark and scrambling for answers. This cruel tactic forces you to chase after them, apologize when you haven’t even done anything wrong, or beg for their attention. The longer they ignore you, the more desperate you become for their validation.
6. They Play Mind Games That Leave You Second-Guessing Yourself
Gaslighting is their favorite sport. It’s not just about denying facts; it’s about making you feel insane for questioning reality. They’ll twist your words, distort your memories, and make you doubt your own perceptions. One minute, they’ll say something hurtful, and the next, they’ll act like you’re overreacting or imagining things. By the end of it, you’ll be questioning whether you’re the one with the problem, and that’s exactly what they want. Narcissists thrive on confusion, because it keeps you under their control.
7. They Create Chaos and Then Play the Victim
Narcissists are masters of starting fires and then acting like they’re the ones being burned. They’ll stir up drama, create problems, or even cause conflict between you and others. And when the dust settles and everyone’s left picking up the pieces, they’ll position themselves as the victim of the whole mess. It’s infuriating, because no matter how much you try to explain that they were the instigator, everyone around them is caught up in their manipulation. They play the victim like a pro, leaving you looking like the villain for pointing out the truth.
8. They Use Your Weaknesses as Ammo Against You
A narcissist is never truly interested in your well-being. They only want to know your vulnerabilities so they can use them to control you. If you’ve ever confided in a narcissist about something sensitive, whether it’s your fears, past mistakes, or insecurities, expect that information to come back to haunt you. In times of conflict or to get something they want, they’ll throw those weaknesses back in your face, using them to attack your character and break you down. Your vulnerabilities aren’t safe with them, they’re weapons.
9. They Will Never Acknowledge Your Needs
You could be screaming for help, emotionally drained, or in need of support, but the narcissist will never acknowledge it. They’ll redirect everything back to themselves. If you dare mention that you need something, whether it’s affection, attention, or even just a listening ear, you’re met with indifference or, worse, contempt. They’ll act like your needs are insignificant or even try to turn the conversation around to make your needs seem selfish. Narcissists don’t see you as a person with your own emotions; they only see what you can do for them.
10. They Will Destroy Your Self-Esteem and Then Blame You for It
This is one of the most shocking things narcissists do, they break you down, erode your confidence, and then make you feel like it’s your fault. They criticize you in ways that leave scars, constantly pointing out your flaws, shortcomings, and mistakes, all while pretending that they’re trying to “help” you improve. Over time, you start questioning your own worth. And when you finally snap or try to defend yourself, the narcissist will say you’re the one who’s “too sensitive,” “overreacting,” or “mentally unstable.” They’ll push you so far that your self-esteem collapses, and then, when it’s in tatters, they’ll stand back and say it’s your own fault for being so fragile.
CONCLUSION
Narcissists are emotional predators, and they leave destruction in their wake. They’ll lie, manipulate, and destroy anyone who stands in the way of their need for control and validation. What’s truly shocking isn’t just their behavior, it’s how long they can maintain their facade and make you question your own reality. If you ever find yourself in their web, it’s crucial to recognize these patterns and protect yourself before they strip you of everything that makes you who you are.
